Hello Spongey here.
So, let's look at Cartoon Network.
I won't go into it's full history, we all know it was awesome, then went downhill. But as i am not a nostalgia nutcase, i still liked it
Recently, CN is getting better, with shows like Adventure Time, Regular Show, and The Amazing World of Gumball. And then, a new show was announced. It was quickly dismissed, and hated. But, i was willing to defend it, so i decided to watch it./
However, i watched 6 episodes...and it is so awful, i can't even describe it.
This, is The Problem Solverz. (Why a Z instead of an S? CUZ POOR LITERACY IS KEWL)
Show Plot: The series centers on the titular Problem Solverz trio of Alfe, Roba, and Horace, as they solve and sometimes create the various problems that plague their town
First Episode: Time Twister
Episode Plot: The trio encounters a time-traveling rollercoaster that ages a class of elementary school students. Alfe later uses it to satisfy his pizza cravings.
Final Thoughts:
God,i really wanted to like this, but...it's so bad!
It's such a horrible peace of shit. But let's go into detail!
The animation, is simply awful. There's so many colors, and nothing looks structured at all. And it looks like an 80's game barfed all over the place. With all the other surreal shows, they had some kind of excuse to have strange animation. But this, it's never explained! It's so ugly to look at.
The premise, is a little interesting. But they fucked it up. The plot is always hard to follow, because of all this random shit going on. And the times you CAN follow it, it's stupid, cliche, and predictable.
The characters , are just...let's talk about them.
First, the leader, Horace. Voiced by this guy: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kyle_Kaplan
. He's the best of the 3. He's very boring, and doesn't have much personality. But he never got on my nerves at all, so that is why he is the best.
Then there's roba, who is voiced by series creator, ben jones. He's also bland. Also he's in a robot suit. Why? No reason. He's very annoying at times, and he's not funny at all. One epsidoe, had him followed by a TPS fangirl (lol those exist) , who is voiced by Kari Wahlgren. Who My P&F watches might know as Suzy. it makes him less bad...because the girl is so annoying! Just imagine Serria, from total drama, but even more annoying!
Last, is alfe. Voiced by ben jones as well. I hate him so much. He looks like domo, crossed with a turd. That is why i say alfe, instead of shit. (though ben jones said he is a half man-dog-anteater.). The guy is annoying, arrogant, and whining. Nine times out of ten, he's the one who saves the day. The writers love him, but i hate him. I hate characters like that. Alfe sucks
There's a small amount of minor characters too. Most notably. Tux Dog, voiced by John DiMaggio. He is an extremely wealthy dog who helps the Problem Solverz in some of their cases, but is just as often the source of their problems. He insults Roba for his off-color personality and his appearance, which i agree with him. He is the best character. Which is liking saying the left side of a turd smells better. He's an asshole to the Problem Solverz. Which we all can commend. He has the only consistently funny lines in the show.
Also, i hear there is a guy called Jerome, voiced By...Vincet Martella.
I just died inside. But i have yet to see an ep with him, so there's nothing to say.
But before i sum it up, i gotta talk about the series finale. That's right, this piece of alfe didn't last more then a season. Now, here's a quote from my Good friend, Tony. He has a blog that did a review of this episode. Ahem. "Now as for this episode itself? Astonishingly meta. It seems this show is aware that is is absolutely despised by 98% of everybody who has ever watched it, and it has seemingly embraced it and used it as subject matter for its episode. I commend it for that, honestly, but besides that, nothing stood out. The tagger character was alright, and surprisingly the sequence inside the “flat dimension” was well done, but I didn’t laugh once and every joke was too predictable and retreaded. Overall, despite its self-aware nature, the season (and quite obviously series) finale was about as bad as every episode before it"
So in conclusion, let's quote him again. "This show was fucking horrible. It’s animation is too ugly and bright despite being stylistic and purposeful; the voice actors are loud and annoying despite several of them being talented people (John DiMaggio, Grey DeLisle, Chris Parnell, George Tekai, and Mark Hamil have all lent their voices and have been wasted); the show’s surrealism is hallow and pretentious and out-of-date, like something from Newgrounds made in 5 minutes by some baked college kid; the story and plot is dull and lifeless and is used solely as a support beam for the characters to be loud and random."
So what could of been a decent show is instead one of the worst cartoons i've seen. That is all. Spongey out!
To read the the blog i quoted, go here: http://toonswithtony.wordpress.com/
See ya!
Monday, June 20, 2011
Monday, May 30, 2011
Movie Review: Sharpay's Fabulous Adventure
Hello, spongey here.
Remember my top 11 list of things i like, that other's hate?
Well, you might remember high school musical on that list. I said i liked all the movies. Yes, i still do!
Today, i will review the recent installemt...
Sharpay's Fabulous Adventure!
Plot: Sharpay is given a chance to star in his newest show on Broadway. She convices her father to let her move to New York City on her own but he has a condition: if the plan backfires, Sharpay is forced to move back with her parents and work at Lava Springs. She moves into some place with a dude named Peyton, and she heads to auditon for the play but, When she finds out they only want her dog Boi, (insert zelda CDI joke here) she auditions him but only to be caught in a tie with very competitive Roger Elliston. And to top that, the real star of the play,Amber Lee is in a evil bitch who wants to get rid of the dogs
Songs: Unlike the others, this isn't song heavy. only 3, or 4. I like them, but the opening song is the best.
Final Thoughts:
Here's how i rank the Hsm films
1. HSM 3
2. This
3. HSM 1
4. HSM 2
Yes, this is the 2nd best in the franchise. Normally, i'd say this is the best, but some awesome parts make me like 3 more.
Anyway, while the story is kinda cliche, i found it to be entertaining in many aspects. And it doesn't feel as..dumb as some of the other movies.
I think what really ties this movie together, is exactly what i liked in the other ones: Sharpay.Villains are always the best part on any movie, and she proves this. She's a charector you love to hate, and she is fairly entertianing. I do admit to beign a ...ashley fanboy a bit, so that's why i like her. In this one, she's less bitchy, but still sharpay of course. But she's more likably, and gets better as it goes on. And the actual villain, is just plain cool.
The other charectors are fun to watch, and while it can get bad at times, it's an entertianing kind of bad, such was the other films. The songs, as i 've stated, are pretty good, and they help the story, rather then bring it to a halt.
I found this to be a nice movie in the franchise, and worth a watch, but only for people who like this kind of thing
But one complaint:
One of the songs is Justin Beiber's Baby.
No, really.
But it's not the orginal one by Justin, it's a cover by Lucas Gabriel, who plays Sharpay's Brother Ryan, who makes a cameo at the end. So that's a plus, but due to the song's inclusion, i must a point away
So yeah, good movie for me
Score: 8/10
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Blog Shout Outs: Blogger Beware
Hello, Spongey here. Welcome to another thing i like to call: Blog Shout outs.
Here, i just gush about blogs i like. Nothing more, nothing less.
Remember Goosebumps? Of course you do, i talked about like 3 blogs ago.
Every kid had read this series, and loved it. However, once you're adult you look back of them and think to yourself, "I liked this?". While it's not the worst series ever, it's not quite as good as we remember. And we might not even remember it! We need someone to tell us every detail of the series, while not being a wikipedia article.
And that's where Blogger Beware comes in.
Now Famous Blogger, Troy Steele, was looking back on these books and thinking "Why isn't there a list of all the Goosebumps twist endings?" (Clearly he's never heard of wikipedia).
So he made this blog.
Blogger Beware is hard to describe, but i'll try my best.
Let me tell how each entry goes, play by play.
First comes a picture of the cover, with the title of the book, and any taglines, or back of book descriptions. Nothing special here, but sometimes a witty remark will come.
Next comes a "brief" plot synopsis. And by that a mean, a long one, detailing most of the events in the book, including spoilers, so if you don't like spoilers, i'd stay away. Along the way, he makes sarcastic comments and remarks, and makes fun off everything, from the plot, to the small quirks we didn't notice.
He also makes references. To what? EVERYTHING! Every entry has tons of these, to anything you can imagine. He can make an obvious one, or a subtle one. It's pretty much his trademark. Infact, there's so many, that a fan has complied a guide, explaining every like reference he makes. That's how many.
Afterwards, he goes to smaller little breakdown into conventions that pop in each book. In no real order, we got the the Platonic Boy-Girl Relationship, where at least one half of it goes away halfway through the book,. but if no one Chucks, he will find someone or something that does something halfway through something else.
Then there's the questionable parenting (or any legal guardian in the novel). In many books, parents will do things no parent would do. This one needs no explaining. And if there is none, he WILL find some parent to make fun of
And we have the Minority Alert. If a non white person pops up, he'll point it, and if it's offensive or not too! Next, R.L. Stine Shows He Is Down With the Kids. This shows that Stine has never met a child in his life. Either, it's something a kid wouldn't do, or just something kids won't connect with.
And my fave, Early 90s Cultural References. Or any references to anything in the book. I like it cuz it's just funny. Not much to say.
Memorable Cliffhanger Chapter Ending is next. Hard to explain, but GB is famous for the CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT scare. So here, he talks about them. In a funny fashion, of course.
And, then, the Great Prose Alert. Mainly a specific line from the book, that is just bad writing.
And last, but not least. The conclusion, Here, he sums up his feelings for the book. Sometimes it's a little joke, and you have to infer what his feeling's are.
And now, why is this blog so good?
Well, it's hard to say. It's extremely funny, and you feel like you are there reading the book with him. His snark is just lovable, and when he LIKES a book, you get a funny feeling inside.
And yes, he makes fun of the series, and RL stine himself, but it's all in good fun, he means no harm.
If you've ever read goosebumps, especially as a kid, you must read Blogger Beware. Now.
BUT, for the last year or two, he got slow on updating. Goes months without updating, which worry his loyal fanbase. But recently, he's gone back to making a one blog a week, on a actual sechudle. So check in every monday, as he is now starting on the recent horrorland series!
To sum it up, I love Blogger beware, and i highly suggest you read it.
Blogger beware...you're in for some laughs!
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Movie Review: The Last Airbender
Hello Spongey here.
Welcome to yet another Review.
A long time ago, fans on Nickeldeon did not live together in harmony. But then everything changed "Avatar: The Last Airbender"{ hit the aiirwaves. And Only M Night Shymaln, master of all twist endings, could adapt it. But when the world needed him most--he blew it. One year has passed and I have discovered the new Avatar; an adaption named "The Last Airbender". "And although the special effects are great..., it has a lot to learn before it's ready to entertain anybody. But I believe...I can save your money,.
Ok enough of that. The point is, today I'm reviewing the live action Adaption of the hit show Avatar.
Let's review, The Last Airbender
Plot: The world of The Last Airbender consists of four societies, the Earth Kingdom, the Water Tribes, the Fire Nation and the Air Nomads. Each society has people capable of manipulating or "bending" the element that is their namesake. Only one person in each generation is capable of bending all of the elements, The Avatar, and whose duty is to be a mediator and peacekeeper of the world. The film's hero is Aang, a young Avatar and Air Nomad found in an iceberg by Water Tribe teenagers Katara and Sokka. Aang learns that his people were massacred by the tyrannical Fire Nation who have been warring with the other societies since Aang was in the iceberg, 100 years ago. Seeking to take his calling seriously, he journeys with his new friends to the North Pole to find a Waterbending master to learn the art. But news that the Avatar has returned spreads quickly, and he is hunted by the disgraced prince of the Fire Nation, Zuko.
Final Thoughts:
...I'm at a lost for words. I really am.
Awhile ago, I said Disaster Movie was the worst movie I've ever seen. But today, that changed.
This movie, is beyond bad. I mean, Wow. Disaster movie failed as a comedy. This, fails as: A drama, an adventure, a fantasy, an adaption, and a movie.
I love the show, but this is shit.
\ would mention the racebending thing this movie caused, by I don't care. That's the least of this movie's problems.
The acting is terrible. Sokka looks like he's cut a bitch at any moment. Katara is dull and does nothing. Anng is just...UGH. It's badly written. Very badly. There's too much exposition. Show, don't tell. Really.
The effects are decent, and some shots look very good, but that just shows that it could have been good, or even so BAD it's good, but no.
They change too much from the show. They fail at turning one whole season into a movie. Nothing works. The acting sucks, the writing sucks, it's too crowded with shit going on.
Also, they pronounce everything wrong. It's Anng, not Onng. Sokka, not Soakka, and Avatar, not Ovatar. (Nor is Iroh, Eroh. Really)
This movie is not bad. No. That's in insult to all bad movies. The room, Troll 2, and Plan 9 from outer space are all bad movies. But they make you proud to say it's bad, it's a badge of honor.
So, as the Nostalgia Critic would put it, this movie is...Horribifuckus.
This is the worst movie ever made. And I will never change my mind
Score: None. It doesn't deserve one.
Welcome to yet another Review.
A long time ago, fans on Nickeldeon did not live together in harmony. But then everything changed "Avatar: The Last Airbender"{ hit the aiirwaves. And Only M Night Shymaln, master of all twist endings, could adapt it. But when the world needed him most--he blew it. One year has passed and I have discovered the new Avatar; an adaption named "The Last Airbender". "And although the special effects are great..., it has a lot to learn before it's ready to entertain anybody. But I believe...I can save your money,.
Ok enough of that. The point is, today I'm reviewing the live action Adaption of the hit show Avatar.
Let's review, The Last Airbender
Plot: The world of The Last Airbender consists of four societies, the Earth Kingdom, the Water Tribes, the Fire Nation and the Air Nomads. Each society has people capable of manipulating or "bending" the element that is their namesake. Only one person in each generation is capable of bending all of the elements, The Avatar, and whose duty is to be a mediator and peacekeeper of the world. The film's hero is Aang, a young Avatar and Air Nomad found in an iceberg by Water Tribe teenagers Katara and Sokka. Aang learns that his people were massacred by the tyrannical Fire Nation who have been warring with the other societies since Aang was in the iceberg, 100 years ago. Seeking to take his calling seriously, he journeys with his new friends to the North Pole to find a Waterbending master to learn the art. But news that the Avatar has returned spreads quickly, and he is hunted by the disgraced prince of the Fire Nation, Zuko.
Final Thoughts:
...I'm at a lost for words. I really am.
Awhile ago, I said Disaster Movie was the worst movie I've ever seen. But today, that changed.
This movie, is beyond bad. I mean, Wow. Disaster movie failed as a comedy. This, fails as: A drama, an adventure, a fantasy, an adaption, and a movie.
I love the show, but this is shit.
\ would mention the racebending thing this movie caused, by I don't care. That's the least of this movie's problems.
The acting is terrible. Sokka looks like he's cut a bitch at any moment. Katara is dull and does nothing. Anng is just...UGH. It's badly written. Very badly. There's too much exposition. Show, don't tell. Really.
The effects are decent, and some shots look very good, but that just shows that it could have been good, or even so BAD it's good, but no.
They change too much from the show. They fail at turning one whole season into a movie. Nothing works. The acting sucks, the writing sucks, it's too crowded with shit going on.
Also, they pronounce everything wrong. It's Anng, not Onng. Sokka, not Soakka, and Avatar, not Ovatar. (Nor is Iroh, Eroh. Really)
This movie is not bad. No. That's in insult to all bad movies. The room, Troll 2, and Plan 9 from outer space are all bad movies. But they make you proud to say it's bad, it's a badge of honor.
So, as the Nostalgia Critic would put it, this movie is...Horribifuckus.
This is the worst movie ever made. And I will never change my mind
Score: None. It doesn't deserve one.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Top 11 Things I like that other's Hate
Hello, Spongey here once again.
If you’re a big fan of That Guy With The Glasses, you might have seen Doug’s recent video, called “Top Films Doug likes, but others hate”. It’s exactly what it says on the tin.
At the end of the video, he says that lots of people like something others don’t, and that if possible, tell us what YOU like that most people hate.
So I’m going to do just that!
So today, I present, The Top 11 Shows, Movie, and one or two books, that I like, that others don’t. So let’s get started.
11. Captain Planet
Before you say anything let me say this: I like it in a So bad it’s good way. This show, from a critical point of it, is terrible. But, damn if it’s not extremely entraining. A lot of people seem to forget that it’s just a cartoon. While it is trying to teach us a moral, that’s still no reason to take it seriously.
Oh and by the way, Heart is an awesome power. After all, nothings better then the power of love.
Anyway, this show was enjoyably stupid, in every way. Every episode was a ton of fun to watch, and I love laughing at all the stupid that happens.
My favorite episode has to be “A Good Bomb is hard to find”. In this one, Blight, one of the shows villains, is visited by her future self. In the future, everything’s clean and pollution free , and a good bomb is hard to find (Hence the title). Naturally, she disapproves of this. So they go back time to they can give a nuclear bomb to Adolph Hitler.
No, I didn’t make that up. Captain Planet. Meets Hitler. And when they meet, Hitler is full of hate that he physically hurts captain planet.
Still not making this up.
Yet, it’s one of the most awesome things ever.
Bottom line: Stupid, but awesome at the same time.
10. Fred
Yes, I like Fred. Let’s just leave it at that.
9. Fanboy and Chum Chum
Oh, I’m gonna get lot of shit for this one.
In all 15 years of my life, I have never seen such a burning hatred for any show, animated or otherwise. I mean, wow..
I watched this show for the first time completely unaware of how much the Internet hates it, and after doing that, my only thoughts were "Holy shit, was that good CGI animation or am I dreaming?". I checked YouTube for some more episodes, and I was shocked to find out how much of a Scrappy this show is.
Final Sum up:...I liked it.
And the Number one thing I like that people hate is...
1. Spongebob Squarepants (Seasons 4-8)
*Sigh* It had to come to this, didn't it?
Let's calm down a bit, and talk about the history behind this, shall we?
The Year is 2005. Spongebob's 3rd Season has ended. No one knew what would happen. The movie has came out, and it was a big hit, and a great movie. Then a 4th season was announced. People though it was over, but more Spongebob was always good.
But of course, shark jumping ensued. Everything seemed weaker. Animation (At first, then it got better), jokes, and other stuff,
And when Season 5 came, people hated it. And Season 6 wasn't any better in their eyes. And now, people really hate it, and it seems like they won't let up.
However, I like it. In fact, I might love it.
I would explain how I grew up with SB, and stuff but that's not important.
I do think the newer seasons are weak, but that;s just it: Weak. It's at worst, average. Besides some gross jokes (Which some people like, mind you)
It's not terrible, far from it. If you watch some episodes, you;ll see that it can be quite good. Check out Season 7, which even the haters say its good, but Season 8 is shaping to be even better.
The show is still decent. It's'. Not. That. Bad.
I get why people would find it weak, but terrible? Come on.
In conclusion, it's still good. Just calm down
So that's my list. And don't think I'm bashing people for having a different opinion. I'm fine if you hate any of the above, just try to give them a 2nd chance. And if you really do hate them, please let it be, cuz you honestly hate them, not becuase other people do. Think for yourself,
Well, see ya!
If you’re a big fan of That Guy With The Glasses, you might have seen Doug’s recent video, called “Top Films Doug likes, but others hate”. It’s exactly what it says on the tin.
At the end of the video, he says that lots of people like something others don’t, and that if possible, tell us what YOU like that most people hate.
So I’m going to do just that!
So today, I present, The Top 11 Shows, Movie, and one or two books, that I like, that others don’t. So let’s get started.
11. Captain Planet
Before you say anything let me say this: I like it in a So bad it’s good way. This show, from a critical point of it, is terrible. But, damn if it’s not extremely entraining. A lot of people seem to forget that it’s just a cartoon. While it is trying to teach us a moral, that’s still no reason to take it seriously.
Oh and by the way, Heart is an awesome power. After all, nothings better then the power of love.
Anyway, this show was enjoyably stupid, in every way. Every episode was a ton of fun to watch, and I love laughing at all the stupid that happens.
My favorite episode has to be “A Good Bomb is hard to find”. In this one, Blight, one of the shows villains, is visited by her future self. In the future, everything’s clean and pollution free , and a good bomb is hard to find (Hence the title). Naturally, she disapproves of this. So they go back time to they can give a nuclear bomb to Adolph Hitler.
No, I didn’t make that up. Captain Planet. Meets Hitler. And when they meet, Hitler is full of hate that he physically hurts captain planet.
Still not making this up.
Yet, it’s one of the most awesome things ever.
Bottom line: Stupid, but awesome at the same time.
10. Fred
Yes, I like Fred. Let’s just leave it at that.
9. Fanboy and Chum Chum
Oh, I’m gonna get lot of shit for this one.
In all 15 years of my life, I have never seen such a burning hatred for any show, animated or otherwise. I mean, wow..
I watched this show for the first time completely unaware of how much the Internet hates it, and after doing that, my only thoughts were "Holy shit, was that good CGI animation or am I dreaming?". I checked YouTube for some more episodes, and I was shocked to find out how much of a Scrappy this show is.
Of course the hate has gone down, thanks to the web's new punching bag, The Problem Solverz
Catching some more episodes on TV, it gradually grew on me. I found the character designs incredibly well-balanced and functional for a modern cartoon. The humor may not be everyone's thing for understandable reasons, but it makes me laugh quite often. I also enjoy the characters a lot - they're all genuinely likeable, if sometimes annoying.
I will admit though that the quality of the episodes is veeery varied, although the recent ones are relatively better than the early ones. Some can get really painful to watch ("Pick a Nose", "Freeze Tag"), others will be entertaining the tenth time around ("Refill Madness", "Digital Pet Cemetery").
Why do people hate it? Well, I may have an idea. They havesome really crappy eps, like the ones mentioned above, that feature disgusting toilet humor, and annoyingly bad jokes, and they just assume the whole show is like that, and miss out on some really good ones.
Now why is this so low on the list? Because, while I do like it, I don’t love it, I’m more fond of the other things on this list then I am of this, which makes their hatedoms bug me more.
So ya, good show, let’s move on
8. Goosebumps: The Streets of Panic Park
yep, it’s a book this time. Ok, this one doesn’t get much hate actually. In fact, I hear very little about it. But when I do hear about it, people bash it. Why? No idea.
Now, this is the conclusion to the first arc, of the Goosebumps Horrorland Series. For those unfamiliar with it here’s the plot;
Kids are being invited to Horrorland as very special guests all of who have dealt with supernatural villains, like puppets, aliens, and some other stuff. They soon start to get wrapped up in a mystery that makes them think Horrorland is no longer safe. Long story short, they escape and end up in another park, called Panic Park. And when they find out what’s going on, they have to get home alive.
Now, in order to explain why I like this book, I’m gonna have to spoil a lot of it, so you’ve been warned.
So it turns out, that along time ago, this guy, who later became known as “The Menace”, ran Panic Park. However, it was incredibly scary, and kids died there all the time. (Yes, death in a Goosebumps book). But he didn’t give a shit, like the complete monster he is. The park so scary, then it got sucked another dimension, which was trapped in time, the 50’s to be exact, forever. And Menace learned, that mirrors can bring from the real to his world, and vice versa. And he’s not happy that Horrorland was built in Panic Park’s place. So he had a Horrorland horror invite kids to Horrorland, so they can be brought to Panic Park, so he can scare the shit out of them so much ,that the park will be brought to the real world. Also of the kids is a spy, I won’t spoil THAT though.
Oh, and turns out he’s done this before, and he mentions that those other kids couldn’t handle the scares. Later on, our heroes stumble upon a church with pictures of kids who been brought the park…and died of freight That’s right; the villain in a Goosebumps book actual killed someone. That makes this the Goosebumps book with the highest body count.
If you want to know more, then just read it. I really liked this book, and I can’t quite see why someone would hate. It’s not perfect, but it’s one of the best GB books ever in my opinion, and it actually has balls for once. Also, the obligatory twist ending is only ok,.
In conclusion, good book. Moving on!
7. High School Musical
Oh now I’m in deep shit.
Everyone has their guilty pleasure. This is mine. Now, I like all of the HSM movies, and am even look forward to the 4th one. (Mainly cuz it gives spotlight to the only character played by someone with singing talent) . It’s not exactly that good, but I do enjoy it. It’s stupid, but it’s harmless. Although, it’s not quite the shitfest people make it out to be. Let’s go through all 3 movies, shall we?
The first one was enjoyably bad. The main characters were bland, but not “Twilight” bland. Just, regular bland . The “villain” was one of the better parts. Not great, but I got enjoyment out of her. (In more ways then one, Giggity!) The songs, are ok. Some are quite good, the catchiest was “Stick to the status qou.
And the best…I forgot the name, and I’m tool lazy to look up. The first one Sharpay sang, which got a reprise that sucked. That one. And I’m not the only one who thinks so , someone on Youtube reviewed it (He said it was bad, not as bad as everyone says it is) and said the same thing. He also refers to Sharpay as “Sexy Tisdale”. Take that of what you will.
HSM is not horrible, I liked it, but more in a guilty pleasure-y way. I don't get the hate though, it's just a freaking tv movie, calm down!
The 2nd one was alright, it didn’t have that fun factor the first one, but some parts were narm tastic. The songs were, eh ok. The catchiest is “Fabulous” (Villains do get the best songs, don’t they?). I can’t which one was best. “Bet on it” was hilarious, for all the wrong reasons. The “You got the music in me” respires was good, but the regular version was only ok. This one is So Okay It’s Average, but not quite as bad people say it is.
Now the 3rd, is not hated! Surprising I know. This one got a theatrical release, so as a result it has more effort, and better production values. This one was the best of the series, IMO. Some of the faults the series had were either fixed, or downplayed. The songs, while not that memorable, were….awesome at times. My favorite is “I want it all”. I also liked Sharpay’s Crowning moment of awesome near the end. Here’s hoping the 4th is at least decent.
Ok this went on WAY longer then it should of. So ya, ok movies. Let’s move on
6. Cars
Ok, this movie isn’t exactly hated, but it’s disliked way more then it should be.
I have some theories on why it’s disliked. The main one is: It following off the heels of The Incredible which was awesome,. And after such a dark movie like that one, seeing a movie like this, was quite different. Going from superheroes, to Cars was quite jarring. People expected their next movie to somehow exceed that movie, but it didn’t so they hated it.
And even if you hate it, you must admit one thing: It’s the only Larry the cable guy movie that is watchable.
I like to think of this movie as pixar’s “Breather Episode” . After making so many movies that were thought provoking, and sometimes even dark, they needed to have some fun, So they made this.
I really like this movie. As par the course for pixar, it's alot of fun. It's not as good some other pixar films, but I still love it. I won't say too much, but it is a good movie. I do sorta get why people hate it, but my god it's not that bad.
And don't even get me started on Cars 2. It looks great to me, and even better then the original. (My fave aspect is, that in most spy movies there's a cool car, here we have a spy movie ABOUT the cool car.). But the bitching is jus stupid. This is the first Pixar movie where people bash it before it comes out. Yes, some people were sceptical about Up and even Toy Story 3, but this is the first time almost everyone is hating on it. You can have your opinion, but don't bitch about something you have not seen, even if you don't like the concept or any bits of it you've actually seen.
To sum it up, great movie
5. Disney Channel Sitcoms
Everyone has their guilty pleasures, as stated before. But while HSM is one for me, this is the true one for me.
Instead of talking about the ones I actually hate (Jonas LA) let's talk about my favorties. First up, The Sutie life, and it's spin off.
It's stupid, idiotic, and not well written. But...I liked it. In this kind of show, stupdity can be a good thing. Plus, in a way, it has a heart to it. There's a reason Tv Tropes gave it a crowning moment of heartwarming page. It feels like they actually tried, and are having fun with it. I like all the actors here (Even...her.) And the one thing that sets this, as well as the other shows I like, from other Disney shows, is that for the most part, the comedy comes from the characters, not the stupid things they do.
The people themselves are funny, and I do laugh. Yes, it's stupid. But that's part of it's charm. The spin of is actually just as good. Especially now that there's somewhat of a story arc, and actual character development. And I do like Bailey (In both ways), and the relationship is good.
Catching some more episodes on TV, it gradually grew on me. I found the character designs incredibly well-balanced and functional for a modern cartoon. The humor may not be everyone's thing for understandable reasons, but it makes me laugh quite often. I also enjoy the characters a lot - they're all genuinely likeable, if sometimes annoying.
I will admit though that the quality of the episodes is veeery varied, although the recent ones are relatively better than the early ones. Some can get really painful to watch ("Pick a Nose", "Freeze Tag"), others will be entertaining the tenth time around ("Refill Madness", "Digital Pet Cemetery").
Why do people hate it? Well, I may have an idea. They havesome really crappy eps, like the ones mentioned above, that feature disgusting toilet humor, and annoyingly bad jokes, and they just assume the whole show is like that, and miss out on some really good ones.
Now why is this so low on the list? Because, while I do like it, I don’t love it, I’m more fond of the other things on this list then I am of this, which makes their hatedoms bug me more.
So ya, good show, let’s move on
8. Goosebumps: The Streets of Panic Park
yep, it’s a book this time. Ok, this one doesn’t get much hate actually. In fact, I hear very little about it. But when I do hear about it, people bash it. Why? No idea.
Now, this is the conclusion to the first arc, of the Goosebumps Horrorland Series. For those unfamiliar with it here’s the plot;
Kids are being invited to Horrorland as very special guests all of who have dealt with supernatural villains, like puppets, aliens, and some other stuff. They soon start to get wrapped up in a mystery that makes them think Horrorland is no longer safe. Long story short, they escape and end up in another park, called Panic Park. And when they find out what’s going on, they have to get home alive.
Now, in order to explain why I like this book, I’m gonna have to spoil a lot of it, so you’ve been warned.
So it turns out, that along time ago, this guy, who later became known as “The Menace”, ran Panic Park. However, it was incredibly scary, and kids died there all the time. (Yes, death in a Goosebumps book). But he didn’t give a shit, like the complete monster he is. The park so scary, then it got sucked another dimension, which was trapped in time, the 50’s to be exact, forever. And Menace learned, that mirrors can bring from the real to his world, and vice versa. And he’s not happy that Horrorland was built in Panic Park’s place. So he had a Horrorland horror invite kids to Horrorland, so they can be brought to Panic Park, so he can scare the shit out of them so much ,that the park will be brought to the real world. Also of the kids is a spy, I won’t spoil THAT though.
Oh, and turns out he’s done this before, and he mentions that those other kids couldn’t handle the scares. Later on, our heroes stumble upon a church with pictures of kids who been brought the park…and died of freight That’s right; the villain in a Goosebumps book actual killed someone. That makes this the Goosebumps book with the highest body count.
If you want to know more, then just read it. I really liked this book, and I can’t quite see why someone would hate. It’s not perfect, but it’s one of the best GB books ever in my opinion, and it actually has balls for once. Also, the obligatory twist ending is only ok,.
In conclusion, good book. Moving on!
7. High School Musical
Oh now I’m in deep shit.
Everyone has their guilty pleasure. This is mine. Now, I like all of the HSM movies, and am even look forward to the 4th one. (Mainly cuz it gives spotlight to the only character played by someone with singing talent) . It’s not exactly that good, but I do enjoy it. It’s stupid, but it’s harmless. Although, it’s not quite the shitfest people make it out to be. Let’s go through all 3 movies, shall we?
The first one was enjoyably bad. The main characters were bland, but not “Twilight” bland. Just, regular bland . The “villain” was one of the better parts. Not great, but I got enjoyment out of her. (In more ways then one, Giggity!) The songs, are ok. Some are quite good, the catchiest was “Stick to the status qou.
And the best…I forgot the name, and I’m tool lazy to look up. The first one Sharpay sang, which got a reprise that sucked. That one. And I’m not the only one who thinks so , someone on Youtube reviewed it (He said it was bad, not as bad as everyone says it is) and said the same thing. He also refers to Sharpay as “Sexy Tisdale”. Take that of what you will.
HSM is not horrible, I liked it, but more in a guilty pleasure-y way. I don't get the hate though, it's just a freaking tv movie, calm down!
The 2nd one was alright, it didn’t have that fun factor the first one, but some parts were narm tastic. The songs were, eh ok. The catchiest is “Fabulous” (Villains do get the best songs, don’t they?). I can’t which one was best. “Bet on it” was hilarious, for all the wrong reasons. The “You got the music in me” respires was good, but the regular version was only ok. This one is So Okay It’s Average, but not quite as bad people say it is.
Now the 3rd, is not hated! Surprising I know. This one got a theatrical release, so as a result it has more effort, and better production values. This one was the best of the series, IMO. Some of the faults the series had were either fixed, or downplayed. The songs, while not that memorable, were….awesome at times. My favorite is “I want it all”. I also liked Sharpay’s Crowning moment of awesome near the end. Here’s hoping the 4th is at least decent.
Ok this went on WAY longer then it should of. So ya, ok movies. Let’s move on
6. Cars
Ok, this movie isn’t exactly hated, but it’s disliked way more then it should be.
I have some theories on why it’s disliked. The main one is: It following off the heels of The Incredible which was awesome,. And after such a dark movie like that one, seeing a movie like this, was quite different. Going from superheroes, to Cars was quite jarring. People expected their next movie to somehow exceed that movie, but it didn’t so they hated it.
And even if you hate it, you must admit one thing: It’s the only Larry the cable guy movie that is watchable.
I like to think of this movie as pixar’s “Breather Episode” . After making so many movies that were thought provoking, and sometimes even dark, they needed to have some fun, So they made this.
I really like this movie. As par the course for pixar, it's alot of fun. It's not as good some other pixar films, but I still love it. I won't say too much, but it is a good movie. I do sorta get why people hate it, but my god it's not that bad.
And don't even get me started on Cars 2. It looks great to me, and even better then the original. (My fave aspect is, that in most spy movies there's a cool car, here we have a spy movie ABOUT the cool car.). But the bitching is jus stupid. This is the first Pixar movie where people bash it before it comes out. Yes, some people were sceptical about Up and even Toy Story 3, but this is the first time almost everyone is hating on it. You can have your opinion, but don't bitch about something you have not seen, even if you don't like the concept or any bits of it you've actually seen.
To sum it up, great movie
5. Disney Channel Sitcoms
Everyone has their guilty pleasures, as stated before. But while HSM is one for me, this is the true one for me.
Instead of talking about the ones I actually hate (Jonas LA) let's talk about my favorties. First up, The Sutie life, and it's spin off.
It's stupid, idiotic, and not well written. But...I liked it. In this kind of show, stupdity can be a good thing. Plus, in a way, it has a heart to it. There's a reason Tv Tropes gave it a crowning moment of heartwarming page. It feels like they actually tried, and are having fun with it. I like all the actors here (Even...her.) And the one thing that sets this, as well as the other shows I like, from other Disney shows, is that for the most part, the comedy comes from the characters, not the stupid things they do.
The people themselves are funny, and I do laugh. Yes, it's stupid. But that's part of it's charm. The spin of is actually just as good. Especially now that there's somewhat of a story arc, and actual character development. And I do like Bailey (In both ways), and the relationship is good.
But now it's cancled, and yes, i like the finale.
This was the first disney show I saw, and I saw it when I was a bit younger, so it holds a place in my heart/
Next, we have Wizards of Waverly Place. I know a guy who hates the above, and likes this show. Yeah, Disney haters like this show. Wow. Anyway, I won't go into too much deatail here. Again, comedy comes from characters. But here we have a family thing going on that adds a heart to it. The movie (as ass pull-y as it might be to some) shows this off. Season 4 shows it more, and adds a good story arc that actually has you wondering what will happen next. I like it.
And now we have Good Luck Charlie. Again, Disney Haters like it. But even people who hate the above like it. Heck, even tv tropes, which hates these shows, likes it. Why? For one reason. All the shows have one thing in common: They have a twist. Example: Normal kids...that live in a hotel. Normally family....of wizard. Normal girl...that is a super star.
This show? Normal baby and family.....that IS a normal baby and family! (Though i think Charlie might be an evil robot, but that's just me) That's right, it's just a normal sitcom. Another thing, all these shows have the main characters name in the title. Ok, the last one doesn't, which is another reason it's good. I won't go to far into, but it is good.
I'm ok with people hating them, cuz i see why. But i like them, so let's move on
4. Click (Not to be confused with the Goosebumps ep/story with the same name...and plot..and producer)
I don't know how hated it is, but I rarely see positive reviews it, it's close enough.
Now, I don't hate Adam Sandler. He can be funny, but the problem is always chooses the worst scripts/ And he still hasn't learned his lesson (Just go with it? How about just go...far away). He's a decent dramatic actor, surprisingly enough. And this movie proves it.
Yes, it does have the whole work workaholic cliche, but it's done ok here. Some people complain about the ending, but I won't spoil it. Sandler does a decent job, and he's quite funny at some points.
And of course, how can I not mention Christopher Walken? He's great as usual. Gotta love him. The plot is good, and for the most part it's very good.
However, we have a case of trailers always lie. At first glance this seems like your typical Sandler comedy. But it's a bit different. It's...a TearJerker. No really. I've seen several people say they cried at it. The one scene that gets most people, is when Sandler uses the remote to skip most of his lfie....and his Dad's death. He looks at the last time he talked to him and...he was a dick. It's more tear-jerking then it sounds.
I have little else to say, just that I quite like this movie, and it's one of my favorites from Sandler...but Punch Drunk Love is better.
3. Shrek The Third
I actually just finished watching this one for a 2nd time, as I'm writing this, To get a better understanding for why I liked this, I gotta tell my history with the Shrek movies.
I saw the first movie at a friends house when I was 9 or 10. I liked it alot, but I didn't remember much outside of the main plot.
I saw Shrek 2 in theaters when it came out and I loved it, i even got it on DVD. (Lost it long ago though)
Soon after, I noticed i only saw the first one once, so I watched it when it was shown on Cartoon Network (Before it started sucking). I...found to be underwhelming. I actually agree with Doug, when he said in his top 10 comedies video, that it was underwhelming. BUT, It was good. I liked it. But it wasn't great, and it wasn't all that funny. So i loved Shrek 2
I didn't see 3 when it came out, cuz I was waiting for the DVD. So I was shocked when the reviews came in. It's terrible? Damn, I couldn't believe it!
I saw it on youtube (Before viacom came in). And...I thought it was ok. I couldn't see how it was so bad.
Watching it again, I liked it. Quite a bit actually. Why it so hated it? Well, I understand WHY, It's an average sequel at best. And the first 2 were better.
But maybe my views on the first one helped this out. Knowing how lackluster the series could get, I was fully prepared for how good or bad it could be.
I think the plot is good, and it does it job, in telling us more of the story. Prince Charming is good as the bad guy, and team up with the princesses as well as the fairy tale baddies was awesome.
I get why people might dislike it, but there's nothing terrible about it. When a joke falls flat, it falls flat, nothing more. I liked this movie, and as far as sequels go it could of been worse. And no, I have not seen Shrek Forever After, -er the Final chapter- er Shrek 3D, er Shrek Goes to white castle- er whatever the fuck it's called.
So the sum it up, decent sequel. (Eric Idle is awesome as Merlin by the way)
2. Chicken Little
Oh boy, here we go.
A This was the first CG movie in the Animated Disney canon, and this was the jump the shark moment for many Disney fans. (And this was BEFORE Hannah Montana aired).
But, I liked it. I saw it in theaters when it came out, and it wasn't til I got older that I found out it was hated.
I think the story is actually clever. The alien part is sorta stupid, but hey it's a cartoon, stupider things have happened.
I dare say some parts were quite heartwarming, and chicken little himself is kinda likable. (Plus in the movie shown at the end, he's Adam Freaking West!).
It's also very funny, but that's all subjective. However, it's not one of the best Disney movies. I quite liked it, but it is a weaker effort. Even if say Dreamworks put this out, it would still be a weaker effort. And that;s not an insult, it's still very good.
As for why it's hated...can't tell ya. Besides what i said, i don't get it. It's not that bad at all! But whatever...
This was the first disney show I saw, and I saw it when I was a bit younger, so it holds a place in my heart/
Next, we have Wizards of Waverly Place. I know a guy who hates the above, and likes this show. Yeah, Disney haters like this show. Wow. Anyway, I won't go into too much deatail here. Again, comedy comes from characters. But here we have a family thing going on that adds a heart to it. The movie (as ass pull-y as it might be to some) shows this off. Season 4 shows it more, and adds a good story arc that actually has you wondering what will happen next. I like it.
And now we have Good Luck Charlie. Again, Disney Haters like it. But even people who hate the above like it. Heck, even tv tropes, which hates these shows, likes it. Why? For one reason. All the shows have one thing in common: They have a twist. Example: Normal kids...that live in a hotel. Normally family....of wizard. Normal girl...that is a super star.
This show? Normal baby and family.....that IS a normal baby and family! (Though i think Charlie might be an evil robot, but that's just me) That's right, it's just a normal sitcom. Another thing, all these shows have the main characters name in the title. Ok, the last one doesn't, which is another reason it's good. I won't go to far into, but it is good.
I'm ok with people hating them, cuz i see why. But i like them, so let's move on
4. Click (Not to be confused with the Goosebumps ep/story with the same name...and plot..and producer)
I don't know how hated it is, but I rarely see positive reviews it, it's close enough.
Now, I don't hate Adam Sandler. He can be funny, but the problem is always chooses the worst scripts/ And he still hasn't learned his lesson (Just go with it? How about just go...far away). He's a decent dramatic actor, surprisingly enough. And this movie proves it.
Yes, it does have the whole work workaholic cliche, but it's done ok here. Some people complain about the ending, but I won't spoil it. Sandler does a decent job, and he's quite funny at some points.
And of course, how can I not mention Christopher Walken? He's great as usual. Gotta love him. The plot is good, and for the most part it's very good.
However, we have a case of trailers always lie. At first glance this seems like your typical Sandler comedy. But it's a bit different. It's...a TearJerker. No really. I've seen several people say they cried at it. The one scene that gets most people, is when Sandler uses the remote to skip most of his lfie....and his Dad's death. He looks at the last time he talked to him and...he was a dick. It's more tear-jerking then it sounds.
I have little else to say, just that I quite like this movie, and it's one of my favorites from Sandler...but Punch Drunk Love is better.
3. Shrek The Third
I actually just finished watching this one for a 2nd time, as I'm writing this, To get a better understanding for why I liked this, I gotta tell my history with the Shrek movies.
I saw the first movie at a friends house when I was 9 or 10. I liked it alot, but I didn't remember much outside of the main plot.
I saw Shrek 2 in theaters when it came out and I loved it, i even got it on DVD. (Lost it long ago though)
Soon after, I noticed i only saw the first one once, so I watched it when it was shown on Cartoon Network (Before it started sucking). I...found to be underwhelming. I actually agree with Doug, when he said in his top 10 comedies video, that it was underwhelming. BUT, It was good. I liked it. But it wasn't great, and it wasn't all that funny. So i loved Shrek 2
I didn't see 3 when it came out, cuz I was waiting for the DVD. So I was shocked when the reviews came in. It's terrible? Damn, I couldn't believe it!
I saw it on youtube (Before viacom came in). And...I thought it was ok. I couldn't see how it was so bad.
Watching it again, I liked it. Quite a bit actually. Why it so hated it? Well, I understand WHY, It's an average sequel at best. And the first 2 were better.
But maybe my views on the first one helped this out. Knowing how lackluster the series could get, I was fully prepared for how good or bad it could be.
I think the plot is good, and it does it job, in telling us more of the story. Prince Charming is good as the bad guy, and team up with the princesses as well as the fairy tale baddies was awesome.
I get why people might dislike it, but there's nothing terrible about it. When a joke falls flat, it falls flat, nothing more. I liked this movie, and as far as sequels go it could of been worse. And no, I have not seen Shrek Forever After, -er the Final chapter- er Shrek 3D, er Shrek Goes to white castle- er whatever the fuck it's called.
So the sum it up, decent sequel. (Eric Idle is awesome as Merlin by the way)
2. Chicken Little
Oh boy, here we go.
A This was the first CG movie in the Animated Disney canon, and this was the jump the shark moment for many Disney fans. (And this was BEFORE Hannah Montana aired).
But, I liked it. I saw it in theaters when it came out, and it wasn't til I got older that I found out it was hated.
I think the story is actually clever. The alien part is sorta stupid, but hey it's a cartoon, stupider things have happened.
I dare say some parts were quite heartwarming, and chicken little himself is kinda likable. (Plus in the movie shown at the end, he's Adam Freaking West!).
It's also very funny, but that's all subjective. However, it's not one of the best Disney movies. I quite liked it, but it is a weaker effort. Even if say Dreamworks put this out, it would still be a weaker effort. And that;s not an insult, it's still very good.
As for why it's hated...can't tell ya. Besides what i said, i don't get it. It's not that bad at all! But whatever...
Final Sum up:...I liked it.
And the Number one thing I like that people hate is...
1. Spongebob Squarepants (Seasons 4-8)
*Sigh* It had to come to this, didn't it?
Let's calm down a bit, and talk about the history behind this, shall we?
The Year is 2005. Spongebob's 3rd Season has ended. No one knew what would happen. The movie has came out, and it was a big hit, and a great movie. Then a 4th season was announced. People though it was over, but more Spongebob was always good.
But of course, shark jumping ensued. Everything seemed weaker. Animation (At first, then it got better), jokes, and other stuff,
And when Season 5 came, people hated it. And Season 6 wasn't any better in their eyes. And now, people really hate it, and it seems like they won't let up.
However, I like it. In fact, I might love it.
I would explain how I grew up with SB, and stuff but that's not important.
I do think the newer seasons are weak, but that;s just it: Weak. It's at worst, average. Besides some gross jokes (Which some people like, mind you)
It's not terrible, far from it. If you watch some episodes, you;ll see that it can be quite good. Check out Season 7, which even the haters say its good, but Season 8 is shaping to be even better.
The show is still decent. It's'. Not. That. Bad.
I get why people would find it weak, but terrible? Come on.
In conclusion, it's still good. Just calm down
So that's my list. And don't think I'm bashing people for having a different opinion. I'm fine if you hate any of the above, just try to give them a 2nd chance. And if you really do hate them, please let it be, cuz you honestly hate them, not becuase other people do. Think for yourself,
Well, see ya!
Sunday, March 6, 2011
A Review of the Worst movie I've ever seen
Hello Spongey here.
Sometimes People ask me "Spongey, what is the worst movie you've ever seen?"
I've thought long and hard (Heh, long and hard) about this.
If you asked me a week ago, I would of said "Garbage Pail kids".
But yesterday, I have a seen a movie, that makes GPK look like Citizen Kane in Comparasion!
What movie? Well before I tell you, let me tell you a little history.
As I explained in another review. Even since popular works have entered the world, people have been mocking them trough parodies time and time again.
And the early 2000's a spoof film alled "Scary Movie" came out. It was good, and a huge hit. The film had 6 writers...sort of. 2 of them just made the orginal script the others scrapped it, and wrote a better one.
Those 2 writers, were named Jason Freidberg and Araon Seltzer. A few years later, they made thier own movie called "Date Movie". It...was crap. Then they made Epic Movie and Meet The Spartans which were also terrible.
But those movies are Citizen Kane, comarped to what they made next...
DISASTER MOVIE!
Now, I could do an Agony Booth-esque recap of the film but...I don't wanna think about this movie anymore then I have to.
So let's just do what I do in all my reviews.
Plot: None. There is NO PLOT AT ALL. To quote someone from the actual movie, "There's earthquakes or some shit". Or to be more specific, the world is being plagued by Disasters (besides Seltzerberg's movies) and the only way to stop it...is to put the crystal skull back on it's mantle no joke.
Final Thoughts:
This...is the worst movie ever. This was a painful experience.
What happened to good spoof movies? Like Ariplane, or Hot shots? Hell even Scary Movie was better!
This is just shit. That's it. The acting is horrible, the writing is lazy, the jokes are shit, and there's no plot at all.
To quote Roger Ebert, I hated this movie. Hated hated hated hated hated this movie. Hated it. Hated every simpering stupid vacant audience-insulting moment of it. Hated the sensibility that thought anyone would like it. Hated the implied insult to the audience by its belief that anyone would be entertained by it. And I'm not kidding.
Yes, GPK was bad. Batman and Robin was bad. The Last Airbender. was bnag. But there's one thing they sort of have that this movie does not: A plot. There's no plot. Just random pop culture references for 90 minutes.
This movie is so bad, that The Spill Crew, famous for hating Seltzerberg's films, gave it the lowest possible score...A "Fuck You". A rating invented for this movie. That's how bad it is.
Weill, I got THAT out of my system.
Anyway, this movie is fittingly named, because it was a Disaster at the box office. Even the fans. (What little they were) knew this was shit. BUT, they made another one called "Vampires suck" which was the best of their films. Which isn't saying much. It still sucked.
Final Score: -90000/10
See ya later!
Sometimes People ask me "Spongey, what is the worst movie you've ever seen?"
I've thought long and hard (Heh, long and hard) about this.
If you asked me a week ago, I would of said "Garbage Pail kids".
But yesterday, I have a seen a movie, that makes GPK look like Citizen Kane in Comparasion!
What movie? Well before I tell you, let me tell you a little history.
As I explained in another review. Even since popular works have entered the world, people have been mocking them trough parodies time and time again.
And the early 2000's a spoof film alled "Scary Movie" came out. It was good, and a huge hit. The film had 6 writers...sort of. 2 of them just made the orginal script the others scrapped it, and wrote a better one.
Those 2 writers, were named Jason Freidberg and Araon Seltzer. A few years later, they made thier own movie called "Date Movie". It...was crap. Then they made Epic Movie and Meet The Spartans which were also terrible.
But those movies are Citizen Kane, comarped to what they made next...
DISASTER MOVIE!
Now, I could do an Agony Booth-esque recap of the film but...I don't wanna think about this movie anymore then I have to.
So let's just do what I do in all my reviews.
Plot: None. There is NO PLOT AT ALL. To quote someone from the actual movie, "There's earthquakes or some shit". Or to be more specific, the world is being plagued by Disasters (besides Seltzerberg's movies) and the only way to stop it...is to put the crystal skull back on it's mantle no joke.
Final Thoughts:
This...is the worst movie ever. This was a painful experience.
What happened to good spoof movies? Like Ariplane, or Hot shots? Hell even Scary Movie was better!
This is just shit. That's it. The acting is horrible, the writing is lazy, the jokes are shit, and there's no plot at all.
To quote Roger Ebert, I hated this movie. Hated hated hated hated hated this movie. Hated it. Hated every simpering stupid vacant audience-insulting moment of it. Hated the sensibility that thought anyone would like it. Hated the implied insult to the audience by its belief that anyone would be entertained by it. And I'm not kidding.
Yes, GPK was bad. Batman and Robin was bad. The Last Airbender. was bnag. But there's one thing they sort of have that this movie does not: A plot. There's no plot. Just random pop culture references for 90 minutes.
This movie is so bad, that The Spill Crew, famous for hating Seltzerberg's films, gave it the lowest possible score...A "Fuck You". A rating invented for this movie. That's how bad it is.
Weill, I got THAT out of my system.
Anyway, this movie is fittingly named, because it was a Disaster at the box office. Even the fans. (What little they were) knew this was shit. BUT, they made another one called "Vampires suck" which was the best of their films. Which isn't saying much. It still sucked.
Final Score: -90000/10
See ya later!
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Book Review: Gooflumps Stay Out of The Bathroom
Hello Spongey here. Sorry if you were expecting the Villain songs thing, but I wanted to do this.
Hello and Welcome to my first review.
Before we start the review, let’s look at some backstory.
In 1992, R.L Stine, author of several Horror novels, including the Series Fear Street, decided to write a children’s Horror series known as Goosebumps.
The series was VERY successful even spawning a Tv Series in 1995, which ran for 4 Seasons. There were several spin off series, including Series 2000, Give Yourself Goosebumps, and recent Goosebumps Horrorland..
Now let’s talk about another popular thing: Parodies. Even since popular works have entered the world, people have been mocking them trough parodies time and time again.
So naturally, Goosebumps got one. Which brings to today’s Subject: Gooflumps: Stay Out Of The Bathroom.
In 1995, a man named Robert Huges took the penname of “R.U. Slime” (Get it?) and write a 2 part parody series of Goosebumps. The 2nd being “Eat Cheese and Barf!”. But I haven’t read that one so here we are.
So, is it a good satire, or a bad one? Let’s take a look.
Plot: Joe is a regular kid, but then one day, he breaks the toilet, so they gotta buy a new one, from a strange man. Then, odd things happen, such his family acting batshit insane. Soon, he finds out that the toilet is actually a transporter made by aliens, so they can kidnap humans and replace them with androids do they can- you guessed it, take over the world. (OF COURSE!). Now, Joe must stop them before it’s too late.
Final Thoughts:
Now, I’m gonna judge this both as a satire, and as a book by itself.
As a attire, it’s decent. It doesn’t parody any specific Goosebumps book, but the series itself, and Stine’s writing style. It feels like an actual GB book at some points, but when something un Goosebumps-like happens, it feels out of place. Example: A short rap. No I’m not kidding.
But it goes hit several Goosebumps elements: The stupid chapter breaks, the parents being scientists, supernatural things happening to normal kids, the stupid parents, the bitchy siblings, and of course….the things jumping out that seem like a monster, but is really something normal.
Anyway, this is decent satire. It makes fun GB, in a affectionate way. But I wish they had referenced other aspects of the series, and parodied specific books more often.
As a book itself, it’s pretty good. The jokes are usually funny, and story is silly, but interesting. Some parts were kinda stupid, and some things didn’t work too well.
But overall, it’s nice, funny story. My main complaint, is that it feels more like a parody of kids horror in genral, rather then goosebumps. But, if you look it at like that, it’s much better.
I give Stay out the bathroom as 8 out of 10
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